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Tama's Musings
The scenery may change, but the bus driver doesn't.
So many times I've felt edgy about my life like a high-strung gambler. Maybe the Universe won't take care of me this time. Maybe I bet too much. Maybe I didn't read the signs right. And worst of all, maybe the cynics are right and life is just a cold black hole and not an available garden. Then just when I'm about to disintegrate, something shifts, a closed door opens or a generosity occurs, and then I'm sheepish, grateful, silly and faithful again. I feel loved and I can go on. But where is that love when I'm scared? Why does it drop out of sight?
It doesn't drop out of sight. I get scared and close my eyes. I stop loving myself and my life. I breathe more shallowly. I tense my heart, rein in my faith, and constrict my energy. Love is always there when I'm open. But sunlight can not pierce through brick.
Recently I facilitated at a women's retreat held at an eco-resort in the gorgeous Mayan Riviera in Mexico. I remember first arriving and staring at this remote and pristine beach of gleaming aqua blue water and smooth white sand. I wanted to cry. The beauty stung me. It rattled me and stilled me. My travel sweat evaporated. I felt naked and robed at the same time, emptied and filled. And most of all, I felt very, very loved. I felt loved in that moment, loved in the past, and loved for all time.
Before arriving, I'd had a week that had challenged my confidence and faith in every way. I felt weary inside, tired of giving myself constant pep talks just to function. But standing in that hypnotic, warm water, recognizing that my inner voice had brought me here, I remember feeling, "I am always cared for." It just suddenly seemed logical. I could not be this loved in this moment and forgotten in the next. The nature of this love was all encompassing. Sacred love is consistent.
The Universe isn't like a rotten boyfriend who loses interest in you if you gain 3 pounds or forgets to call you on your birthday. The love of the Universe is not erratic or fickle. Love does not suddenly turn away from us. But we turn away from this love. When we face challenges and losses in our lives, we often can't see how love would allow this to happen. We turn our lack of understanding into a loss of trust and a very sad line in the sand.
There is a line in A Course in Miracles that says "God has not changed His Mind about you. You are His beloved child in whom He is well-pleased." The problem is that we often change our mind about God, or about Spirit or the Universe or whatever we call that loving undercurrent in our lives.
At a recent retreat, I did an exercise with the group I called "Forgiving the Universe or Forgiving God." I asked everyone to write down things that made them stop believing in a guiding, loving energy in their lives. Together we explored our disappointments, tragedies, or muffled feelings of confusion. I suggested that we re-look at these situations to see if we had any responsibility in them, any growth potential, or any other ways of perceiving a soul gift in them. Our lives always present us with chances to heal, grow, and develop into our limitless true selves. Sometimes we don't see the love or opportunity and we contract with pain and harden our hearts. With hardened hearts, we find even less love in our lives and less reason to believe in good things. Forgiveness offers us the chance to soften again and walk in open fields.
Many of us have believed that if there's a loving Universe, then everything goes our way. But that's not transcendent love. Transcendent love is a presence that stretches us, grows us, dares us to be the greatest expression of ourselves we can be, and loves us all the while. Real love is bigger than our present understanding. When I was a child, I thought I would drink Hawaiian Punch for the rest of my life. I couldn't imagine why I wouldn't. I worshipped that sweet red beverage and absolutely knew I'd want to consume it always. But as I got older, my tastes changed. There was orange Kool-Aid for example. And today, there is bottled water. I'm glad I couldn't shape my life from that part of me that was absolutely convinced it knew what I wanted and what was best.
Of course I've faced more arduous transitions than the loss of Hawaiian Punch. I've trafficked with betrayal, loss of love, and financial insecurity. And still my life evolved into the exact right expression of me. That's why I believe that love knows me better than I know myself. I only know my current self. But love knows all my capacities, my destiny and potential. I don't always get "my way," but I always find myself along the way.
Just try on the idea that sacred love is consistent. No matter what's going on, you are still safe and the clouds are not real. I often tell clients, "the scenery may change, but the bus driver doesn't." Sometimes our imaginations take us on horrible journeys, but we are still sitting on the bus and it's still heading in the right direction. We all go through periods of loss and adjustment, but we can always find fresh inspiration. The love that inspired you yesterday is still within you and has new vehicles for expression. Remember, the scenery may change, but the bus driver doesn't.
On that same magical trip to Mexico, I decided to get a temporary henna tattoo done on my ankle. I picked a Chinese symbol that represented the word "Always." I smiled to myself with recognition. I wanted to remind myself that the same loving force that had helped me experience this women's retreat was the same loving force that blessed me always, even in times of shadow and strain.
Maybe it's pretty ironic that I got a temporary tattoo with the word "Always." But it's perfect too. Because that tattoo will fade from sight, just as my comfort and trust will no doubt fade from my experience. But always is always. I am always loved, whether or not I see it or feel it. If I have ever been guided and loved once, that same force is with me now. As it is with you. Love does not change its mind. And these days, I'm trying to not change mine about love.
Yours in the dance,
Tama
©Copyright 2005 Tama J. Kieves
Want to discuss this or any other aspect of living your dreams? Please visit our free discussion forum at:
http://www.awakeningartistry.com/resources.discussion.html
Behind the Scenes at Awakening Artistry
Dear Awakening Artistry family members,
Our most recent adventures took us to beautiful Eureka, California, where Tama lead a workshop and day retreat. After an incredible 300 mile drive through lush wine country and stunning Redwood forests, we were told that we were now considered to be "behind the Redwood Curtain." We were thrilled. We were then informed that “behind the Redwood Curtain” is considered to be a slur on the people who live there, as in they are cut off from the progress of the world. But if that’s true at all, that must be why we experienced such electric, creative, fun people at the workshop and retreat. We left behind some new, great friends and a very lively “Create the Work you Love” support group. We give many thanks to Pat Cowan and her husband Dane, two bright spirits on the path, for making everything happen and for opening their huge hearts to us.
Toward the end of April, Tama and I drove to Salt Lake City, Utah to participate in the 30th anniversary tribute conference for A Course in Miracles. We felt so grateful to be part of an “international family” that is helping to heal the world through promoting love instead of fear. It was also a great privilege for Tama to share the stage with such A Course in Miracles figures as Gary Renard (bestselling author of The Disappearance of the Universe), John Mundy (publisher of Miracles Magazine, and numerous books about A Course in Miracles) and Robert Perry (author and international speaker on A Course in Miracles), to name a few. Tama's refreshingly honest, down to earth and humorous approach made her a big hit. We look forward to being part of the next conference, which will be held in San Francisco in 2007.
In May, Tama was squeezing pure white sand through her barefoot toes while she looked out on the crystal blue waters of the Mayan Riviera. What a way to make a living! She was the “keynote speaker” in a tee shirt, shorts, and bare feet at a 6 day women's retreat on the remote beaches of Kailuum, Mexico, about 40 minutes south of Cancun. Known and loved by people around the world, this unique eco resort has no electricity and guests eat by candlelight and torches and sleep in thatched huts just a few feet from the ocean. We want to thank Michelle Barbic and Judy Silva of GG Connections for brainstorming and putting together such a magical blend of women healers and healing women and creating a time out of time.
Moving forward, we're excited about the next destination vacation at the Canyon Ranch 6 star spa resort in Tucson, Arizona this July. This event has sold out, but we have a waiting list and we have more destination vacations and retreats scheduled (There’s “Discovering the Work You were Meant to Do - The Ultimate Women Lawyers Retreat” in Asheville, N.C. a Creativity retreat in Mt. Shasta, CA, and a Create the Work You Love retreat at Kripalu in Lenox, MA) and more to come soon. Also, our 12 week “Creating the Work You Love” home study course (E-Course) has been continuing to grow in popularity. Our current one is our largest class to date. We've been getting glowing evaluations and are now offering a $10 discount if you sign up with a friend.
Until next time, I wish you continued blessings on your journey,
Paul
Destination Vacations:
We are terribly excited about the world-class destination vacations and life-changing retreats Tama has scheduled in 2005 and want to help you plan ahead and not miss out on the time of your life!!
July 11-15 2005 "Journey to the SELF" at Canyon Ranch in the foothills of Tucson. An all inclusive package deal with $500 spa services included... Leave behind everything you know and step into an exquisite world of self-care and healing of the soul. It's your time to blossom. Join us on a sacred bliss-filled journey back to the core of your strength, passion, and connection. Take time out of your life to rest and discover your True Self as never before. Your intimate group will meet daily with Tama for inspiring group-visioning and focusing sessions while you pursue your own special pilgrimage at Canyon Ranch, a six star spa. Each day, you will have your pick of the world class activities and services of Canyon Ranch, such as pilates classes, aromatherapy, Canyon stone massage, Watsu water treatments, writing and watercolor classes, nutritional cooking classes, meditation, tarot card readings, and so much more---and finally a safe and nurturing group to share all your insights with and take them even deeper.
 Download more information (PDF format)
(please note that the above retreat has filled -- but we do have a waiting list and you may get in)
August 19-21, 2005 "AWAKENING YOUR CREATIVE SPIRIT: A Retreat at Mt. Shasta Resort at Mt. Shasta, CA. Join us on this retreat and trip to Dunsmuir Botanical Gardens. More details will be available shortly ... for more information, please contact Ross Clark at (775) 783-1405 or via email at Rossclark2@aol.com
September 2-5, 2005 "Reconnecting with your Self and Discovering the Work You Were Meant to Do: The Ultimate Women Lawyer's Retreat. Do you sometimes feel like you want to be doing something else with your life? Are you so busy that you don't even know what you want? You were born for great things. And you have the ability to achieve them. Why not take some time out for you and find out where your spirit wants to take you now. Come spend a delicious weekend in the Blue Ridge Mountains recovering, replenishing and reconnecting with yourself. Relax and enjoy the beautiful mountain views. Rejuvenate with morning Yoga, indulge in a private in-room massage treatment, and savor delicious vegetarian cuisine.
Download more information (PDF format)
Place deposit now on-line
October 10-14, 2005 "THIS TIME I DANCE: Trusting the Journey of Creating the Work You Love" at Kripalu Center for Yoga and Health in Lenox, MA -- in the Berkshire Mountains. Do you feel stuck in your career? Wish you could take your creativity and vision into the world in an extraordinary way? Your wildest dreams are not frivolous. They are your source for inspired abilities and explosive direction, and in uncertain economic times, true passion is your greatest security. Join Tama for a life-changing 4 days of stirring up your creative and visionary self and taking real leaps in your life--to create the work you were born to do. See the Kripalu Web Site for more details, phone 800-741-7353, or
Download more information (PDF format)
Upcoming Event Highlights:
As always, please visit our Calendar page for a complete and up-to-date listing of events. We are always adding events: http://www.awakeningartistry.com/calendar.html
Do you have friends and family in any of these areas? Please considering sharing this information with them.
In our ongoing mission to give people permission to live their authentic and creative lives, we are always looking for new groups to talk to. If you have a group or know of a group that would be interested in hosting Tama, please let us know. Much of how we reach and create community is through miracles like you!
June 2005
| June 26
Denver CO
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Community Picnic in the Park
Join us for our Annual Awakening Artistry community picnic in the park. Meet with other creative, passionate, visionary minds, seekers, folks in transition, travelers on the amazing journey of life! We'll have live music. It's free. Please bring your friends and family. Platt Park (Logan & Iowa Sts.) 5:30 - 8:00pm.
Download more information (PDF)
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June 27 -
August 29
Denver CO
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A Course in Miracles: An Experiential Workshop of Choosing Love Instead of Fear. Weekly support for living an inspired life. Eight session course. Monday nights. (no class on July 4 and July 11)
Download more information (PDF)
Register now on-line
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July 2005
July 5 -
September 20
Online
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Creating The Work You Love E-Course
Twelve-Week Home Study Course Begins
Do you ever feel like you're too busy to focus on what you really want to do with your life? Or do you have a hard time staying confident and motivated? For only $75.00, about $6.00 a week, the E-Course is designed to help you coach yourself into creating your dreams. It's all self-paced so there is no need to be available at any particular time. You can transform your life by giving about an hour a week to each lesson! Each lesson comes with a 5 minute audio meditation designed for you to use daily which helps the work take place on a deeper level. You also get access to a special message board where you can share your journey and get support from fellow students around the country. Tama periodically monitors this forum and offers advice.
Download more information (PDF)
Register on-line
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| July 10
Boulder CO
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Fun Ink: Unleashing the Fire of Your Inner Writer
Workshop with Tama at Naropa University, Boulder
Sunday 10:00am - 5:00pm
Do you always say you want to write but then avoid it? Do you wish your writing had more color, soul, or punch? Sounds like it's time to set aside those dream-stealing inner critics and distractions and delve into a hands-on creative writing extravaganza. In a safe and synergistic environment, we will 'exercise' and clear your way to writing that poem, journal entry, novel, or piece of creative nonfiction you've been thinking about. We'll explore ways to be focused, fearless and passionate about your craft while setting free what wants to be written.
Download more information (PDF)
Register through Naropa's web site
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| July 11-15
Tucson AZ
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Journey to the SELF:
Our Canyon Ranch Spa Retreat
Leave behind everything you know and step into an exquisite world of self- care and healing of the soul. It's your time to blossom.
Are you so caught up in everyday life that you don't even know who you are anymore? Have you yearned to reconnect with your Creative Self or your Spiritual Self? Or to take a major leap in your life? Join us on a sacred, bliss- filled journey back to the core of your strength, passion, and connection. Take time out of your life to rest and discover your True Self as never before. Your intimate group will meet daily with Tama for inspiring group-visioning and focusing sessions while you pursue your own special pilgrimage at Canyon Ranch, a six star spa. Each day, you will have your pick of the world class activities and services of Canyon Ranch, such as pilates classes, aromatherapy, Canyon stone massage & bodywork, Watsu water treatments, writing and watercolor classes, nutritional cooking classes, meditation, self-esteem, tarot card readings, communication classes and so much more---and finally a safe and nurturing group to share all your insights with and take them even deeper.
Download complete information (PDF)
(please note that the above retreat has filled -- but we do have a waiting list and you may get in. Contact us at contact@awakeningartistry.com)
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| July 21
Mountain View CA
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Creating The Work You Love
FREE mini-workshop and booksigning at East West Bookshop
324 Castro St., Mountain View
7:30pm - 9:00pm
If you're this successful doing work you don't love, what could you do with work you do love? Come join Tama for this transformational hands-on evening workshop, and explore how to get clear about what you truly desire, create the means and strategy to focus on your dream and, most of all, "trust the journey" of working from your heart. Phone 650-988-9800 for directions/information.
Download more information (PDF)
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| July 22-24
Sacramento CA
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Awakening Your Creative Spirit
Tama will speak at the Women's Retreat for Spiritual Life Center
San Damiano Retreat Center, Sacramento
More details to follow soon.
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August 2005
| August 19-21
Mt. Shasta, CA
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Awakening Your Creative Spirit: A Retreat at Mt. Shasta Resort
A Destination Vacation
Join us for this retreat, which includes a trip to Dunsmuir Botanical Gardens. More details will be available on our web site shortly...for more information, please contact Ross Clark at (775) 783-1405 or via email at Rossclark2@aol.com.
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September 2005
October 2005
| October 10-14
Lenox MA
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THIS TIME I DANCE: Trusting the Journey of Creating the Work You Love at Kripalu Center for Yoga and Health in Lenox, MA -- in the Berkshire Mountains
A Destination Vacation
Do you feel stuck in your career? Wish you could take your creativity and vision into the world in an extraordinary way? Your wildest dreams are not frivolous. They are your source for inspired abilities and explosive direction, and in uncertain economic times, true passion is your greatest security. Join Tama for a life-changing 4 days of stirring up your creative and visionary self and taking real leaps in your life--to create the work you were born to do. To be held at the Kripalu Center for Yoga and Health in the Berkshire Mountains of Massachusetts -- during peak leaf-changing season! See the Kripalu Web Site for more details, phone 800-741-7353, or
Download more information (PDF)
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Our address: Awakening Artistry, P.O. Box 9040, Denver, CO 80209-9040
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